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My life isn't as perfect as you think it is. May 19, 2011
Insecurity at 6:20 PMI stayed near my phone, thinking of when your name would show up. But then I realised, I was never that important to you. Argh. Super depressed luhh. *Big sad face* ): Got back our papers and guess what. I failed 3 subjects. What a great way of telling me, '' O levels are coming.'' No bloody mood to do anything. Well, slacked with Arif at the PB room today after school. Talked about almost everything under the sun in the dark and depressing room. Seems like he was just as depressed as I was. Talked about everything from results to SC. I'm glad that he was there with me though, or I would have emo-ed for hours in school alone. Ranted at him bout almost all of my troubles, problems and even hesitations. Really thankful that he was willing to listen to me rant though. Thought that no one would ever bother about me. Problems, troubles are all masqueraded behind the friendly smile. Well, now then I realised that the aerospace module is not at Nanyang Poly. What a wet blanket. And to think that I ever thought of going there with you every morning. Hopes dashed. Well, I just have to get used to that fact. Life just sucks when you need someone the most. Cause no one seems to be there for you. A friend once told me, '' That's life. What can you do about it?'' These few days I've been thinking alot. All these thoughts focused on one topic, and it just had to be that particular topic which I would preferably avoid. But there are many things that we just can't avoid no matter how hard we try so why not face it now? A lot of ' What ifs ' had been showing up on my mind, and I really hope that these are just ' What ifs '. Thoughts about.. what if he was in sec3? / what if you preferred him to me? / what if you had a change of heart? Stupid thoughts just kept haunting me. I tried telling myself that it's just my overly-wild imagination but sometimes it just gets too real for me to deceive myself. Such stupid things kept damping my spirits. If you wanted me beside you, you would have told me. I think I just ranted a little too much but, still no mood though. So yeah... Labels: Swaying thoughts. My life's as bitter as the chocolate that I ate. May 12, 2011
Argh. at 11:57 AMSHITT MY CARD READER!!! Okay.. I wanna upload my pictures but my card reader just won't listen to me and be a good little piece of worthless machinery. ( No wonder it doesn't work.. hehehe :D ) Well, the weather these few days is really bitchy. Is it the heat or the humidity that's haunting us?? Hmmm... Everyday sleep in aircon room cause can't take the heat then the next morning I start to regret my decisions... My sinus starts again.. AND IT JUST HAD TO BE DURING EXAM TIMES.. Then when I step out of the air-con room, the sudden surge of hot air just blows me away. Just wanna stay in the air-con room and not come out.. But HELL YEAH!! GWH for Chinese Drama!! HELL YEAH!! LOL. Overly excited already. First SYF of my life so yeah... Hehehe :D. It was awesome~~ Guess what? MCY said to me, '' Wow.. You are very efficient...'' LOL. HAHAHA. okay.. I think i overly hyper already. xDD Well, going Serena Tan's house later for why I-don't-know. The rest of the class just said that they were going so I just tag along. Kinda bored staying at home anyways. I WANT TO GO BACK SCHOOL!! Next friday's is the Physics module at Nanyang Poly. O: And someone's going for their Chemistry module as well~~. Make me jealous only. I WANT CHEMISTRY LOL. Nevermind, Shall be contented with what I already have. But sad, 9hours of not seeing each other. I swear I'll go crazy. D: Now that MYE's over, I miss the times where we can go home at like.. 10am? And I think that I screwed up MYE. Amaths was like so bloody difficult, I couldn't understand physics... I think I just screwed up my life so badly. But thank goodness I have you. :D It has been 49 days. ^^ Labels: Will you hold it against me? My life's as bitter as the chocolate that I ate. May 3, 2011
at 6:49 PMOKOK. MYE CURRENTLY. Though I got a lot of free and spare time, lazy update. LOL. So wait for it. Literally WAIT. Bye guys. :D My life's as bitter as the chocolate that I ate. |
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